I cant believe justin bieber poisoned our water supply, burned our crops, and delivered a plague unto our houses
No, but are we gonna wait around until he does!?
wHY THE FUCK DO PEOPLE IN MY HOUSE DO THIS OH MY FUCKING GOD IT TAKES LIKE THREE SECONDS TO CHANGE THE ROLL OF TOLIET PAPER EVERYONE IN THE THIS HOUSE IS A PIECE OF SHIT AND GUESS WHERE THE TOLIET PAPER IS???? NOT ON THE GOD DAMN TOLIET PAPER ROLL HOLDER.
I feel this on a spiritual level
hairdresser: what do you want me to do?
me: just a trim thanks
hairdresser: no problem
i a mfucking laughing so hard jesuss i thought id found my boyfriend’s porn folder and i was like “hehehe what’s this gif” because it looked super porny in the preview so i click it and
ohym fching god
Is that Ashley Tisdale?!
Are those tacos
I just love how we actually have a gif for that
this kid behind me in history was like “my neck hurts so bad” and I said “do you want me to snap it for you?” and my teacher yelled at me
fuck u all with snow to play in u know what happens in australia????/ we have a fucking santa claus with fucking thongs and board shorts and we go to the fucking beach and get sand in our butt cracks
my physics teacher told us a joke today
three guys are on a boat and they have four cigarettes, but no lighters or matches or anything to light it with. What do they do?
They throw one cigarette over board and the whole boat becomes a cigarette lighter
A CIGARETTE LIGHTER
I ACTUALLY GET IT OH MY GOD YES
I STILL DON’T GET IT
HOLY SHIT I FINALLY GET IT
whenever youre sad imagine your icon descending from the heavens and gently whispering “ding dong what is wrong” in your ear
WHY DID I EVER THINK MAKING THIS POST WAS A GOOD IDEA
OKAY, SO I WORK IN A RESTAURANT
IT’S BLACK FRIDAY
AND A COUPLE WEARING CAMOUFLAGE COMES IN
AND BEFORE I COULD STOP MYSELF
"SO WERE YOU GUYS OUT HUNTING FOR DEALS?"
I’ve never broken a bone which just seems too suspicious to me I probably don’t have any bones